Should Alabama sue Texas over the recent tornadoes?

Follow this logic.  Last month, Texas Governor Rick Perry proclaimed Easter weekend (April 22-24) as “Days of Prayer for Rain in the State of Texas.”  Never mind the blatant unconstitutionality and foolish superstition of this stunt: Perry claims, with a straight face, to be able (or at least eligible) to convince the Almighty Creator of the Universe to relieve his state of their record-breaking drought.

Apparently the Almighty has said not only “No,” but “Hell, no.”  As of May 12, the drought has dramatically worsened.  In one week alone, the portion of Texas considered under “exceptional drought” has doubled.  Now half the state is suffering under the highest state of drought recognized by climatologists.  (Perry is a climate change denier, too, so he’d probably argue “What do the climatologists know?”)

It would seem Perry’s “Days of Prayer for Rain” were a colossal flop.  Or were they?  For four days immediately after Easter weekend (April 25-28), the Southeastern United States was ravaged by the worst outbreak of tornadoes in recorded history. Weekly rainfall reached nearly 20 inches in some places. At least 340 innocent human beings lost their lives, thousands have been left injured or homeless, and property damage is in the billions of dollars.

Advocates for the efficacy of prayer are fond of explaining away their failure to get results by claiming “Sometimes God says ‘No.'”  If they believe that, they will also believe–and surely they can’t deny–that sometimes God says “No…but how ’bout this instead?”

Had Texas been drenched with rain on April 25-28, with no concomitant death and destruction, you can rest assured that Governor Perry would have shouted his success from the highest point in Texas (that’s Guadalupe Peak; 8,749 feet above sea level, in case you wanted to know).  But will Perry claim that not only has Jehovah been unimpressed with his imprecations, He decided instead to give Texas’ neighbors a soaking of (almost literally) Biblical proportions?  Not on your life.

Alabama got the worst of it by far from the recent storms.  Alabama’s Governor Robert J. Bentley is, like Perry, a praying man.  As a devout Southern Baptist (and a man who, by his own admission, does not consider non-Christians to be his “brothers and sisters“), surely Bentley believes in the power of prayer.  If so, he should sue Texas Governor Rick Perry for causing the catastrophic rains that have caused much of Alabama to be declared a federal disaster area.  Put Perry’s feet to the fire: either he’ll plead guilty to Incitement of the Deity or Accessory to an Act of God, or say that God wasn’t cooperating that week, or (fat chance) admit that he doesn’t believe all that prayer folderol and the Days of Prayer for Rain were just a political stunt.

I don’t mean to make light of the suffering of those affected by these recent storms. I intend merely to engage in a little thought experiment to highlight the stupidity, bigotry, hypocrisy and opportunism of our elected officials.  The sooner the South wises up and throws these assholes out of office, the better.

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